The Italian Influence on New Year’s Eve Party Wear - New Year’s Eve outfits for women 40+ to feel confident

Italians are famous for their celebratory spirit, especially around New Year's Eve.

Here is what women can wear to bring that Italian flair to New Year’s Eve parties.

The Italians – never knowingly underdressed! – love to dress up on a daily basis and for a night such as New Year’s Eve, they go all out for glamorous, yet sophisticated looks for the night.

Luxurious velvet outfits and chic black ensembles are their go-to for evenings out.

Giorgio Armani

To channel your inner Italian and know that you are dressed perfectly for the occasion, always go for the best quality you can afford.  It is worth investing in eveningwear, even though you won’t wear it very often.  If you opt for classic cuts, rather than trendy shapes which will come and go, then you be able to bring the items out year after year and always look glamorous. 

I recently went to a party where one of my colleagues, who is in her 80s, came in a simple pair of black slacks, a silk blouse and a black velvet smoking jacket.  She looked incredible and everything she was wearing was over 30 years old!

Try to shy away from sparkles – they are very bad for the environment for a start, but sequins also tend to shed and look shabby quite quickly.

Loro Piano

I have mentioned this before, but don’t be afraid to bring out the same outfit year after year, or even more than once each season.  The Italians count it as a compliment if someone notices that they have worn something before!  You don’t need a new outfit for every occasion, which means that you can spend more on the one outfit. 

To make it look a bit different, or to update it, add accessories that are in a current colour trend or shape, or that really fit with your style personality.

Dolce and Gabbana

And of course – don’t forget your shoes.  These can make or break an outfit and can spoil your night if they are so uncomfortable that you can’t dance, or even walk in them!  Some shoes, as beautiful as they are, should only be worn on an evening where a lot of sitting is involved!

There are so many lovely ballerina shoes in the shops, but try to go for a more pointed toe, as the rounded toe will shorten the leg and won’t be quite as flattering. 

If you want a bit more height, then opt for a kitten heel, which are easy to walk in and always look elegant.  Sling-backs are very “in” at the moment and, in my opinion, are always on trend, so it is worth investing in a good-quality pair.

Finish off the look with a small evening bag or clutch – keep it elegant, just big enough for your phone, a make-up compact and lippy!

Oh – and to be truly Italian on New Year’s Eve – it is considered good luck to wear red panties!

Why not read - https://www.theitalianessence.com/post/from-festive-fashions-to-heartfelt-feelings-exploring-the-emotions-behind-christmas-outfits

From Festive Fashions to Heartfelt Feelings: Exploring the Emotions Behind Christmas Outfits - Tips for Christmas Outfit Confidence

Life can be stressful enough and then they give you Christmas fairy lights!!

I love Christmas, it really is my favourite time of year, but the stresses and strains that it can bring with it are immense.  Whilst some of us are thoroughly enjoying the Christmas festivities and can’t wait for the day to come, for others it is a time of loneliness, bitter-sweet memories, or stress and anxiety, to name but a few.

Add the worry about what to wear to all the money worries and the angst of spending time with relations in close quarters, then it starts to make you wonder why we put ourselves through it every year!

Don’t get me wrong, I love dressing up and one of the things I enjoy most about my Christmas planning is sorting out what I am going to wear, even if I am only spending Christmas with my son and husband at home.  But the constant barrage of images, adverts and articles we get from magazines, newspapers and the television can really put pressure on us and make us believe that Christmas will be a complete disaster without having matching pyjamas to open our stockings in.

Marks and Spencer

I recently read an article that suggested the aforementioned pyjamas for stocking opening with a glass of champagne, then changing for the church service, then another change for pre-lunch drinks, another for lunch, another for the afternoon walk and another for Christmas tea.  I was exhausted just reading the article!  As fun as it might be (for someone like me, anyway!), quite honestly who has the time? See below for Tips for Christmas Outfit Confidence.

These articles and pictures can be inspiring and give great ideas of what you would like to wear,   but they don’t address the triggers, the emotions and thoughts that go through your head when contemplating your outfits, or the abject panic you might feel at having to dress up, show up and actually, potentially, become visible for once.

The thing we have to remember is that we don’t need anyone else’s permission to dress how we want.  It really doesn’t matter what your colleagues think, what your Mother-in-law thinks, or even what your partner thinks. 

What DOES matter is what YOU think.

How do YOU feel?  What do YOU want to look like? 

Easier said than done though, isn’t it?

Oh, the shivers that go down my spine when I think about turning up to a drinks party in a full evening gown when everyone else was in jeans (no one sent me the memo!), or a friend saying in a loud whisper just when there was a lull in conversation, that I should have worn a different bra, or the hostess in a Scottish castle where we were at a house party, informing everyone that I had “done my best, but it was of course home-made”!

We, all of us, need to feel that we belong, and we all need to feel part of the “pack” or “tribe”.  It is human nature.  So, to go out on a limb and wear exactly what we want to wear can be frightening and nerve-wracking.

If a member of your family is constantly jibing at you about things, then you are going to want to appear invisible, or dress in something they would approve of, probably a long way away from how you would like to dress.

If your partner is constantly putting you down, or telling you you’re overweight, then you are going to want to hide under voluminous clothes, so you don’t attract attention.

Or, it may be you yourself, who is self-sabotaging, with negative body thoughts, telling

yourself you are fat, overweight, your hair looks bad, etc, etc.  Or the worst thing, in my opinion – “I just don’t care”.

So many times, I hear from women, when I tell them what I do in my business – “oh, my style evolved many years ago.  I can’t be bothered to change it now”.

Or,

“There is no point in me trying a new style now, I am far too old/overweight/set in my ways”

Or perhaps the saddest of them all,

“No one notices me anyway” ……..

But, if you don’t care, if you don’t worry about how you look, then no one else will.  They are too busy worrying about their own problems and insecurities, believe me!  Would you stand by and watch your sibling, daughter, or friend, just give up on themselves and not bother trying anymore?  I bet you wouldn’t, so why give up on yourself?

Another reason that the festive season can be such a stressful time regards to what we wear, is other people’s agendas.

I was out shopping with one of my lovely ladies a couple of years ago, shopping for her family Christmas and I asked why she kept going for bland and colourless outfits, when I knew her style was far more flamboyant than that.  She thought about it for a while and then said it was because her sister always made comments like, “Well, it’s alright for you, you can afford nice outfits”.  This, in turn, triggered old and deeply set emotions of wanting to keep the peace between her sister and her mum and shut down any resentments before they surfaced, so she always opted for outfits that wouldn’t draw attention to herself, whenever she met up with her sister.

This is a very common theme and I come across it again and again and not just at Christmas.  I am also a victim of it!  For my style, I love to mix up luxe items, such as a sequinned top or a velvet jacket, with a pair of jeans.  Or maybe a smart pair of tuxedo trousers, or shiny skirt, with a chunky jumper or a t-shirt.  This completely fits with my understated glam look which is my "vibe". This is a throwback to never being quite sure of the dress code and often getting it wrong (see earlier story!), so I developed a style that would deliberately stand out and cause comment.  A rebellious style that wasn’t quite wrong, but also not quite right!

These emotions and triggers are with us all the time and can be very hard to overcome, especially at this time of year, when feelings are running high. They come in many forms, from being teased in nursery school for wearing your siblings’ cast-offs or having the “wrong” pair of trainers in our teens, to comments made by friends or family as we get older and are feeling vulnerable and unsure of who we are now.

Another thing we have to deal with is the guilt factor of buying.  All the magazines are full of new outfits and the siren call of the newest trend and the sparkly objects is very hard to ignore.  If you are suffering from a lack of confidence and are dreading going to whatever party, or a "do", then appearing in a new outfit could give you the boost you need, but this can bring all sorts of emotions about overspending.

Do you really need a new outfit?  One thing I recommend is looking through Pinterest and your favourite online store and getting inspiration, but then trying to put a similar outfit together from what you have in your wardrobe.  Or maybe think of an outfit you have worn before that you felt really good in and wear that again.  It is amazing what one can find hidden in the back of a drawer or wardrobe – I have just found a lovely beaded jumper I found in a charity shop last Christmas and I had forgotten all about it!  Perfect for Christmas Day!

5 Tips to Tackle Christmas Outfit Anxiety with Confidence

1.       Make a list of all the events you are going to over the Christmas period and plan your outfits according to the dress code of the event.

2.       “Test drive” your outfits before the event – I recently wore a wool skirt with a pair of tights (pantyhose) and by the time I got the office I had created enough static electricity to light the whole of London’s festive lights! So, just make sure the outfit works with

accessories, etc and that the look you had in your mind, works on you!

3.       Before you go out and buy new clothes, check through your wardrobe and see what you have that you can wear again.  Don’t worry if people have seen it before – take it as a compliment if someone comments that you are wearing something again!

4.       Wear clothes that you feel like “you” in.  If you are wearing something that is the polar opposite of what you normally wear, you will feel uncomfortable and like an imposter in your own clothes and this will make your self-confidence plummet.

5.       If you are layering your clothes, i.e. camisole, blouse, jacket, wrap, then make sure that you feel confident in every layer.  It is no good having a lovely cami to strip down to when you are hot from the dance floor, if you can see your bra through it, or you feel uncomfortable about your arms, etc.  You need to feel happy and confident in everything you are wearing!

Finally, just remember that this season is meant to be fun. 

Enjoy yourself, be yourself and look after yourself!

Happy Christmas to you all!

 Read more about the importance of mind-set here -

Choosing the Right Underwear: Elevate Your Outfit and Enhance Your - what underwear should I wear?

So, let’s talk basics.  And by basics I mean what we wear underneath our clothes.

Your underwear can make or break your outfit.  It can make it look expensive, or it can make it look cheap.

Underwear can also make you feel attractive, sexy and good about yourself, or it can make you feel dowdy, lumpy and frumpy!  It is an important part of our self-care and makes you feel good about yourself.

Firstly though, to look good in your clothes, leave the sexy underwear for the bedroom.  Lots of straps, lace, and bows or buckles, will show and make your outerwear hang incorrectly, or pull in the wrong place.  A smooth line is what we are looking for.

A pair of Spanks or similar under trousers, skirts or dresses, will turn an ordinary outfit into something that looks like a designer outfit.  To make any outfit look really classy and put together, the fit is of paramount importance, as any Italian will tell you and the under-pinning, i.e. your underwear, will enhance that fit.

Shapewear is a good choice for every body type as it smooths the lines and adds a bit of rigidity to an outfit, so even if you don’t need “holding in”, it will create a smooth and supported line.

Body suits are another good choice as they take away the lines caused by the top of knickers and the lower edges of bras.  Go for simple smooth designs, without too much lace and strapping to keep the things smooth.

Be careful when you wear tights (pantyhose) too, as these can cause another line to appear above your knicker line.

Panties

One of my pet hates is a VPL (visible panty line).  So many people don’t bother to look at their rear view in a mirror and a VPL will absolutely ruin any outfit you put on. 

Nobody (except perhaps your partner) should be able to see what type of underwear you have on!

If your panties cut across your bottom they will cause another line, which ruins the outline of your outfit.  If they fit snuggly under your buttocks they will create a pleasing line and will lift your buttocks slightly.

Thongs, in my opinion (please don’t shout me down for this!), should also be worn with caution.  Whilst they undoubtedly solve the problem of a VPL, they do then leave the buttock hanging free and uncovered, so unless you have a tight, toned tush, wearing a thong will show every lump, bump and sag.

Don’t get me wrong! I am all about embracing your body whatever the size, lumps and all.  There are very few of us who have perfect bodies (whatever that is!), and we must dress how we like, but I am also a very strong believer in dressing appropriately – and I don’t mean age appropriately. 

If you really thought about it, would you want the whole world looking at your backside as you walk along the street?   Is it really appropriate that there is very little left to the imagination with a lot of modern outfits?  Everyday dressing now includes very tight, figure-hugging, sportswear, which not only contours every line of your body, it also enhances in lots of cases, with the way the print is positioned.  Appropriate maybe for the gym – the high street, not so much!

The trouble is that most people forget that we are three-dimensional and when they look in the mirror, they just look at the front, forgetting, or not wanting to remember, that they have a rear view!

Bras

To keep your clothes looking stylish and put together, the other area you need to pay attention to is your bra.

A whopping 81% of women wear the wrong size bra and not only is this extremely bad for your boobs, it is also bad for your outfit.  The wrong size bra will create all sorts of bulges and lines, even if you are small-breasted and will make your tops hang in completely the wrong way.

I have seen time and time again with my clients how a simple bra fit completely changes the way their body shape looks and how they view their clothes on them.

So, get yourself down to your local underwear shop – I thoroughly recommend Marks and Spencer for this and all the pictures here are current M&S designs – and get measured for a new bra and invest in some full and supportive panties.  They don’t have to be grey and boring - there are plenty of styles out there that are pretty and elegant.  They also don’t have to be un-sexy.  But if you want something more seductive then leave this for the bedroom!

Colour

So, let’s talk colour.

I love coloured or black underwear, but this can only really be worn under dark colours or jumpers, etc, that are of a thicker material.

Otherwise go for white or, better still, a nude colour.  Although nude is not a seductive colour, it IS the best colour to wear under any clothes, especially white, as white panties and bras can show through white clothes like a beacon, weirdly!

I find, for a normal week, if I wear a nude body, then it doesn’t matter how many times I change my clothes, I am always wearing underwear that will work.  There is nothing more annoying than finding an outfit doesn’t work, you are in a hurry and the underwear you have on will only go with what you were hoping to wear!

If you would like to have a copy of my bra-fitting guide, then please email me at info@elinorsalter.com