What La Dolce Vita Really Means to Me — And Why Style Is Never Frivolous - Style and self-worth

When people hear the words La Dolce Vita, they often picture something out of a dreamy Italian film: Vespa rides at sunset, glasses of wine on a piazza, gelato in hand, and flowing dresses catching the breeze on cobbled streets.

And yes… I won’t lie. There’s a little of that magic woven into the everyday life here in Italy. But the true essence of La Dolce Vita—the Sweet Life—is something far deeper.

For me, La Dolce Vita isn’t a fantasy or a highlight reel you see on Instagram.It’s real.It’s accessible.And it’s something every woman—wherever she lives—deserves to feel in her soul, every single day.

So what is La Dolce Vita to me? - Style and self-worth

It’s waking up and choosing yourself before the world demands your attention.It’s pouring your morning coffee in a beautiful cup, not the chipped one you keep meaning to throw away.It’s standing in front of your wardrobe and selecting clothes that make you feel like the most radiant version of yourself—even if no one but you will see them that day.

It’s taking the time to care.About your body.About your energy.About your presence.

And yes—about your style.

Let me tell you something I really, really want you to hear:

Style is not frivolous.

It’s not just for rich women.It’s not a luxury reserved for celebrities, fashionistas, or magazine covers.It’s not something you save for weddings, big occasions, or “when I finally lose the weight.”

And it’s certainly not an extra or a “treat” that you need to earn.

Somewhere along the way, women were taught that investing time, care, or money into how they present themselves to the world was shallow… self-indulgent… even selfish.

But I need you to know the truth.

How you show up matters.

The way you dress, the way you carry yourself, the energy you radiate—these are not superficial things. They are deeply tied to your self-worth, your confidence, and your joy.

Think about this: People will invest thousands into therapy (and rightly so), life coaching, personal training, meditation apps… all the things designed to make us feel better on the inside.

But what about the outside—the part the world actually sees first?What about the way you dress, the way you stand, the way you walk into a room and take up space?

This is not about impressing others. It’s about you. About feeling good in your skin. About sending a message to the world—and to yourself—that you are worthy of care, attention, and beauty.

Style coaching is not about trends or fashion rules.It’s about reclaiming your identity.It’s about reconnecting with who you truly are—or who you once dreamed of being before life got in the way.

It’s about waking up, opening your wardrobe, and feeling excited—not defeated.

Why does this matter so much to me?

Because I lived the other way for years.

I know what it feels like to shrink. To feel invisible. To stop caring because you’ve convinced yourself it’s “not worth it” or “not the right time.”

But Italy changed that for me.Here, style is not an afterthought. It’s woven into life. It’s respect—for yourself, and for others.

And this belief is at the heart of my new Signature Experience—coming soon.

Not just a style makeover.Not just clothes.A whole life reawakening.

A way to experience La Dolce Vita in your own way—no matter where you live. No matter your size, age, budget, or lifestyle.

Because you deserve to live beautifully, fully, and confidently every day.

If this speaks to your soul... if you’re tired of feeling invisible... if you long for elegance, confidence, and a little Italian magic in your life...

I see you.

And I invite you to start with something simple:

This is why I do the work I do. Because your style—when aligned with who you are—can transform your life.

But maybe something is holding you back.

Maybe you want to reclaim your elegance… but you don’t know where to begin.

💡 Is it guilt? Fear? Confusion?

Let’s find out.

Take my free quiz: What’s Really Holding You Back from Italian Elegance?

In just a few minutes, you’ll uncover the hidden style block that’s keeping you stuck—and get personalised tips to help you move forward with confidence and ease.

Your La Dolce Vita starts here.

[Take the Quiz Now]

Tell me in the comments below (or hit reply): What does La Dolce Vita look like for you? How would your life change if you felt confident, elegant, and radiant every day?

I’d truly love to know.

Con amore,Elinor

Stop Waiting for Weight Loss: Dress for the Woman You Are Now

How many times have you told yourself, “I’ll update my wardrobe when I lose a few pounds”?

You’re not alone. I hear it all the time from women who long to rediscover their style and confidence, but keep pushing it off—waiting until the scale says it’s time. But here’s the truth:

Style has nothing to do with the number on the scale.

In fact, waiting to lose weight before you allow yourself to dress the way you want is one of the biggest barriers to feeling like yourself again. You end up stuck in clothes that don’t reflect your personality, walking around feeling invisible, frumpy, or like an imposter in your own life.

Style is Self-Respect, Not a Reward - stop waiting for weight loss

Somewhere along the line, we were taught to believe that beautiful clothes, bold colors, or form-fitting pieces are “rewards” for being a certain size. That if we just lose the weight, then we’ll deserve the wardrobe we truly want, but we have to stop waiting for weight loss.

But that kind of thinking keeps you small. It delays joy. And it chips away at your confidence, little by little, every time you reach for clothes that don’t feel like you.

The truth? You deserve to feel stylish, powerful, and beautiful right now—exactly as you are.

If It’s a Health Issue, Take Care of You—But Don’t Put Your Life On Hold

Let’s be clear—if your weight is affecting your health and you want to make changes for your wellbeing, I fully support that. Taking care of your body is a form of self-love. But so is honoring who you are in this moment, right now—not six months from now, not ten pounds from now.

Because if you don’t dress for the woman you are now, chances are you never will. Life happens. Pounds fluctuate. And waiting until some future version of yourself arrives means you'll miss out on feeling good today.

When You Dress the Body You Have, You Reclaim Your Power

Embracing your body as it is—and dressing it with care, elegance, and personality—isn’t giving up. It’s showing up.

Italian women do this beautifully. They don’t wait to be a certain size to enjoy fashion. They dress with pride and presence, no matter their shape. They live la bella figura—the art of putting your best self forward, always.

You can do that too.

Start by asking:

• Who do I want to be seen as?

• How do I want to feel when I walk into a room?

• What kind of clothes would reflect my inner essence today?

  
  

Then go out and dress her. Not the version you’re waiting to become. The version of you that’s here, breathing, living, and worthy now.

Carry on reading https://www.theitalianessence.com/post/personal-transformation-for-women

Ready to Reclaim Your Style — and Your Self?

If you’ve been putting off dressing the way you truly want—waiting until the “right” moment or the “right” size—let this be your sign to stop waiting.

You don’t need to lose weight to feel beautiful. You just need to start dressing like the woman you already are inside.

A Taste of La Dolce Vita is a 90-minute 1:1 style and soul session designed to help you reconnect with your essence, your elegance, and your Italian soul. Together, we’ll uncover your true style, reignite your confidence, and take that first step toward la dolce vita—your way.

This is more than a style session. It’s a celebration of you.

👉 Click here to learn more and book your session

Becoming Me in Italy: A Life Changing Journey In Italy

Moving to Italy as an expat woman - I can remember the day we originally left for Italy as if it was yesterday.  It was VERY early in the morning, and we drove off in our 4x4 with a horse trailer on the back full of the necessities for 3 months, 2 dogs tucked in the back of the car amongst cases and bags and our 4-year-old son, strapped into his seat.  My parents were standing on the doorstep sleepily waving goodbye.

It was an incredibly bittersweet moment, as on one hand we were so excited for our new life, but on the other hand, my mother had just been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease and it was very hard to leave her.

The drive over was not without incident – in fact I could probably write a whole book on that journey alone! – but we eventually got to our destination; a rented house in the hills above Lake Trasimeno.  We were staying there for 3 months, whilst we house hunted.

I don’t think I had ever felt so adrift in all my life.  I was the only one of the three of us who spoke any sort of Italian and the responsibility hit me like a brick!  It was January and we hadn’t expected Italy to be so cold!  We had a few contacts there, who were ex-pats, but apart from that, we knew no one.

Again, the stories I could tell of those three months would fill another book!  Like the time our Jack Russell picked up some poisoned meat and we had to make a mercy dash to the nearest vet, not knowing where on earth one was!  Or the time we ventured to an English speaking church, where there was a dead saint’s embalmed body in a glass box at the front of the church and a retired opera singer who insisted on singing every hymn loudly and VERY slowly, which ended up in the organist threatening to walk out.  Experiences of all types that enriched and emboldened us.

The great Philosopher Epictetus said “Circumstances don't make the man, they only reveal him to himself.”

― Epictetus

Rediscovering yourself in midlife: He is so right.  Italy was where I found myself.  The real me was revealed and I found that I liked her, I recognised her and I had REALLY missed her.

To be honest I didn’t, until that point, realise that I had lost myself, but when I had that feeling I’d come home, that I felt complete, that I really liked the person I was there, and my petals started to unfurl to show the real me – then I understood how lost I had been.

Living your essence in Italy: All at once I knew who that real me was, the authentic person at my very core.  The person I had once been but had got lost in all the flotsam of life.  The expectations of others, careers, relationships, motherhood, deep-seated emotional triggers, had all chipped away at that core person, until its shape was un-recognisable.  Had I not had the good fortune of going to live in Italy, I could have probably plodded on for ever, remaining in that shape, happy-ish, but feeling ever so slightly dissatisfied and ill-at-ease, as if I was an imposter in my own life.

A life changing in Italy. Time has moved on and we have been in Italy on and off for more than 20 years and now embarking on another chapter and moving back out to our beloved Tarquinia, so I can grow my business in the Country that inspires it.  I have so many clients who are moving out there, who have already made that jump, or who are more than happy to just dream about it.  And they are my main focus.  Helping them find themselves – find their true essence – and start to live the life they were always destined for.  Once they have made that change, that shift, and start to dress for that person, the effects on every area of their life is transformational and what makes my job so wonderful!

Again, as that amazing Philosopher says –

“Know, first, who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.”― Epictetus

I would go one step further though – imagine now who you want to be and start dressing for that person straight away and you will soon become her. 

You have to, it is the law of vibration. 

How exciting is that?!! 😉😎

A Touch Of Essence

Book Now

Colour Analysis

Book Now

 You might be interested to read - Guide to dressing like an Italian

• #BecomingMeInItaly

• #ExpatWomenItaly

• #ItalianStyleJourney

• #MidlifeInItaly

• #LivingItalianEssence

• #ReclaimYourStyle

• #ConfidenceAfter40

• #ItalianLifeTransformation