Stop Waiting for Weight Loss: Dress for the Woman You Are Now

How many times have you told yourself, “I’ll update my wardrobe when I lose a few pounds”?

You’re not alone. I hear it all the time from women who long to rediscover their style and confidence, but keep pushing it off—waiting until the scale says it’s time. But here’s the truth:

Style has nothing to do with the number on the scale.

In fact, waiting to lose weight before you allow yourself to dress the way you want is one of the biggest barriers to feeling like yourself again. You end up stuck in clothes that don’t reflect your personality, walking around feeling invisible, frumpy, or like an imposter in your own life.

Style is Self-Respect, Not a Reward - stop waiting for weight loss

Somewhere along the line, we were taught to believe that beautiful clothes, bold colors, or form-fitting pieces are “rewards” for being a certain size. That if we just lose the weight, then we’ll deserve the wardrobe we truly want, but we have to stop waiting for weight loss.

But that kind of thinking keeps you small. It delays joy. And it chips away at your confidence, little by little, every time you reach for clothes that don’t feel like you.

The truth? You deserve to feel stylish, powerful, and beautiful right now—exactly as you are.

If It’s a Health Issue, Take Care of You—But Don’t Put Your Life On Hold

Let’s be clear—if your weight is affecting your health and you want to make changes for your wellbeing, I fully support that. Taking care of your body is a form of self-love. But so is honoring who you are in this moment, right now—not six months from now, not ten pounds from now.

Because if you don’t dress for the woman you are now, chances are you never will. Life happens. Pounds fluctuate. And waiting until some future version of yourself arrives means you'll miss out on feeling good today.

When You Dress the Body You Have, You Reclaim Your Power

Embracing your body as it is—and dressing it with care, elegance, and personality—isn’t giving up. It’s showing up.

Italian women do this beautifully. They don’t wait to be a certain size to enjoy fashion. They dress with pride and presence, no matter their shape. They live la bella figura—the art of putting your best self forward, always.

You can do that too.

Start by asking:

• Who do I want to be seen as?

• How do I want to feel when I walk into a room?

• What kind of clothes would reflect my inner essence today?

  
  

Then go out and dress her. Not the version you’re waiting to become. The version of you that’s here, breathing, living, and worthy now.

Carry on reading https://www.theitalianessence.com/post/personal-transformation-for-women

Ready to Reclaim Your Style — and Your Self?

If you’ve been putting off dressing the way you truly want—waiting until the “right” moment or the “right” size—let this be your sign to stop waiting.

You don’t need to lose weight to feel beautiful. You just need to start dressing like the woman you already are inside.

A Taste of La Dolce Vita is a 90-minute 1:1 style and soul session designed to help you reconnect with your essence, your elegance, and your Italian soul. Together, we’ll uncover your true style, reignite your confidence, and take that first step toward la dolce vita—your way.

This is more than a style session. It’s a celebration of you.

👉 Click here to learn more and book your session

Becoming Me in Italy: A Life Changing Journey In Italy

Moving to Italy as an expat woman - I can remember the day we originally left for Italy as if it was yesterday.  It was VERY early in the morning, and we drove off in our 4x4 with a horse trailer on the back full of the necessities for 3 months, 2 dogs tucked in the back of the car amongst cases and bags and our 4-year-old son, strapped into his seat.  My parents were standing on the doorstep sleepily waving goodbye.

It was an incredibly bittersweet moment, as on one hand we were so excited for our new life, but on the other hand, my mother had just been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease and it was very hard to leave her.

The drive over was not without incident – in fact I could probably write a whole book on that journey alone! – but we eventually got to our destination; a rented house in the hills above Lake Trasimeno.  We were staying there for 3 months, whilst we house hunted.

I don’t think I had ever felt so adrift in all my life.  I was the only one of the three of us who spoke any sort of Italian and the responsibility hit me like a brick!  It was January and we hadn’t expected Italy to be so cold!  We had a few contacts there, who were ex-pats, but apart from that, we knew no one.

Again, the stories I could tell of those three months would fill another book!  Like the time our Jack Russell picked up some poisoned meat and we had to make a mercy dash to the nearest vet, not knowing where on earth one was!  Or the time we ventured to an English speaking church, where there was a dead saint’s embalmed body in a glass box at the front of the church and a retired opera singer who insisted on singing every hymn loudly and VERY slowly, which ended up in the organist threatening to walk out.  Experiences of all types that enriched and emboldened us.

The great Philosopher Epictetus said “Circumstances don't make the man, they only reveal him to himself.”

― Epictetus

Rediscovering yourself in midlife: He is so right.  Italy was where I found myself.  The real me was revealed and I found that I liked her, I recognised her and I had REALLY missed her.

To be honest I didn’t, until that point, realise that I had lost myself, but when I had that feeling I’d come home, that I felt complete, that I really liked the person I was there, and my petals started to unfurl to show the real me – then I understood how lost I had been.

Living your essence in Italy: All at once I knew who that real me was, the authentic person at my very core.  The person I had once been but had got lost in all the flotsam of life.  The expectations of others, careers, relationships, motherhood, deep-seated emotional triggers, had all chipped away at that core person, until its shape was un-recognisable.  Had I not had the good fortune of going to live in Italy, I could have probably plodded on for ever, remaining in that shape, happy-ish, but feeling ever so slightly dissatisfied and ill-at-ease, as if I was an imposter in my own life.

A life changing in Italy. Time has moved on and we have been in Italy on and off for more than 20 years and now embarking on another chapter and moving back out to our beloved Tarquinia, so I can grow my business in the Country that inspires it.  I have so many clients who are moving out there, who have already made that jump, or who are more than happy to just dream about it.  And they are my main focus.  Helping them find themselves – find their true essence – and start to live the life they were always destined for.  Once they have made that change, that shift, and start to dress for that person, the effects on every area of their life is transformational and what makes my job so wonderful!

Again, as that amazing Philosopher says –

“Know, first, who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.”― Epictetus

I would go one step further though – imagine now who you want to be and start dressing for that person straight away and you will soon become her. 

You have to, it is the law of vibration. 

How exciting is that?!! 😉😎

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 You might be interested to read - Guide to dressing like an Italian

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What All Women Can Learn from Roman Street Style - fashion inspiration

There’s something about Roman women, isn’t there? The way they walk down the street—confident, polished, completely at ease in their skin. It’s not about chasing trends or wearing designer labels. It’s about presence. Effortless elegance. A sense of identity that shows up in how they dress.

If you're an American woman living in Italy—or dreaming of it—you’ve probably noticed it, too. And maybe you’ve wondered how to tap into that same energy, especially if your own style’s taken a backseat over the years.

The truth is: Roman street style isn’t just for the Italians. There’s so much we can learn from observing how these women show up in the world—starting with how they get dressed each day.

Here are five things that really stand out to me every time I walk the streets of Rome.

1. Fit is Everything

Roman women know their bodies. They don’t hide under oversized clothes, and they don’t squeeze into things that don’t fit. Their outfits are tailored, flattering, and look like they were made just for them.

Try this: Stop defaulting to loose layers and start experimenting with structure—think a well-fitted blazer or high-waisted trousers that define your shape. Clothes should work with your body, not against it.

2. Neutrals, But Make Them Chic

Black, white, beige, navy—you see them everywhere. But it never looks boring. It looks elegant. Romans know how to mix textures and fabrics to create interest, even when the color palette is simple.

Try this: Start with a capsule of versatile neutrals. Then layer in interesting textures—like a cashmere sweater with crisp cotton trousers or a leather jacket over a silky blouse.

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3. Accessories Are the Finishing Touch

A great pair of sunglasses, a beautiful bag, or a scarf tied just so—these little details go a long way. They make the simplest outfit look intentional.

Try this: Choose one or two accessories you love and wear them often. Quality matters more than quantity here. Italian style is never about excess—it’s about meaningful pieces.

4. Shoes That Work Hard and Look Good

Roman women are always on the move, but their shoes? Stylish and totally practical. Loafers, elegant sneakers, ankle boots—you’ll rarely see worn-out gym shoes or flip-flops unless they’re actually at the gym or beach. There is NO excuse for ugly shoes!

Try this: Invest in a couple of pairs of well-made shoes that can handle city streets but still make you feel put together. Trust me, the right shoes can change how you feel in your whole outfit.

5. It’s How They Carry Themselves

The most stylish women I see in Rome? They’re not necessarily in designer outfits. It’s the way they hold themselves. There’s a quiet confidence in the way they move. They dress like they know who they are.

Try this: Style is about more than clothes. It’s about how you show up. Start by dressing for the woman you want to be—not the one you feel stuck in. That shift alone can be transformative.

Remember, all women can learn from Roman street style!

A Little Closing Thought:

How to dress like an Italian woman. You don’t have to be born in Italy to embrace this way of showing up. You can begin today—by paying attention to what lights you up, by choosing clothes that reflect you, and by letting go of the guilt around wanting to feel beautiful again.

If this resonates, I’ve created something just for you: 5 Must-have pieces for every expat wardrobe in Italy—a free mini workbook with the 5 most important things to have in your new Italian wardrobe.[Link to download]

And if you’re ready for deeper support, my signature program The Essence of You is now open. It’s designed to help you rediscover who you are and dress for the woman you were always meant to be.

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