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Sep 29
The other morning, after a long period of rain and wearing Barbour coats and carrying an umbrella, it suddenly turned really cold again, unexpectedly. I was rushing out for the train in the very early morning and realised that I wasn’t prepared for this, so I grabbed my husband’s padded coat, stuck a beanie on my head and a random scarf around my neck and ran!
The station is a 40-minute walk there and back and I have to wear trainers. I am really not a trainer girl; they don’t align with my style personality and don’t make me feel good. Even the one’s I bought from GEOX, which are slim-lined, and VERY comfortable. If I could, I would walk the distance in high heels, or pointed ballet flats, but unfortunately these days I need to have extra support for that distance, so trainers it is!
However, what I need to make sure I do is change out of the trainers into shoes more suited to my personality before I go to any meeting, see a client, or do anything that needs me to feel empowered or confident. Yes, the right shoes really do have that effect on me – as does the right outfit.
It was borne home even more when I caught the train home. I was wrapped up in aforementioned outerwear and was wearing my trainers - which really didn’t go with the ¾ length carrot fit, pinstriped trousers and red tights I had on! – and stood next to a lady who looked wonderful. She had a pair of black boots, black trousers (so far, so ordinary!), but on top of that she had a beautiful, black, deep piled, faux fur coat and the crowning glory – a seal grey, faux fur, beanie. She looked marvellous and next to her, with my shopping bags and un-prepared outfit, I felt like a bag lady!
Instead of my outfit being the armour that helps provide the self-confidence I need to get through the day, it became a leaky sieve, with that self-confidence gushing out of the holes!
So, there were three main lessons I learnt, or re-learnt, from this.
1. Always prepare my outfit for the next day, the night before. Check the weather and plan accordingly. This not only saves a ton of time in the morning but means that there should be less wardrobe fails!
2. Never neglect your outerwear. We tend to focus on our main outfit and look amazing, smart and put together here, then throw on some old, moth-eaten coat, or an old, battered raincoat, on top, which immediately changes the vibe and also sends out signals to both you and others around you, that you don’t care. A good overcoat is well worth investing in, as if you get a classic design, this will last for years and uplevel any outfit.
3. What you wear deeply impacts how you feel and how you show up during the day. This is a drum that I keep beating, but it is SO important. If you find your true core self and dress for that person each and every day, whatever that day has in store, you will feel empowered and confident and that will affect how you deal with other people and the events during your day.
What you wear not only affects how you feel, it is also your calling card, or business card to the world. It lets people know what you think about yourself, how your conduct yourself and your business, what you care about and also, to some degree, what you do for a living.
It is important not just to restrict this to your work wear, but to your leisure/weekend wear too. I remember bumping into an old friend during Covid and I hadn’t seen her for years. I was in scruffy jeans and walking shoes and felt so embarrassed when she asked me what I did for work and I mumbled “personal stylist”, as I felt nothing like a personal stylist at that point – I certainly wasn’t being a good advert for my business!
I am not suggesting that we have to be on show all the time and wearing our best clothes 24/7, but we do have to be aware of what image we are projecting on ourselves and others. Afterall, if you spend most of your time gardening or walking the dogs, then doing that in something you feel good about yourself in, even if it is jeans and a sweatshirt, will make you feel happier than hiding away in your scruffiest clothes, praying that you won’t see anyone!
What’s your go-to outfit for boosting confidence?
Share your favourite style tips or let me know how your wardrobe affects your mood in the comments below!
And if you're looking to make more intentional choices about your wardrobe, feel free to reach out—I’d love to help you style for confidence every day!
